The Princess' Vow
by dabih
Summary: AU. Princess Selene, in a fit of righteous anger at the marriage alliance, vows to never love the prince who she has been promised to. But once she meets the beloved Prince Kai, does she have the willpower to keep this promise?


**AN: After this is finished, I will go back to writing Different, don't worry. I'm trying a different writing style in this fic, I hope it's well received. It gets a bit philosophical at the end, be warned.**

* * *

The Princess' Vow

 _(and the Time She Betrayed It)_

* * *

" _We set fire to these skies for our love and I'd do it all again_

 _I'm damned for loving you_

 _Curse the stars now there's no escape_

 _Cause your walls are my favorite vice"_

 _\- "damned." by Miguel_

* * *

Selene never wanted to get married. That was her mother's choice – the queen's choice, destined to go unquestioned because it was, after all, _the queen's choice_.

No matter how handsome, no matter how kind, she vowed to herself that she would never love the prince. And no matter how good it was for Luna, she would never forgive her mother for this intrusion on her life.

* * *

The spaceship glittered, twinkled in the sunlight on the day it landed on Earth. The Lunars would be spending a month at the palace. The "peace" festival would be ruined by evil, greedy _Lunars_. Prince Kai grimaced. It was the emperor's choice, though – it had nothing to do with him, even though he was the one betrothed. He hated the idea.

The royal family stopped off their ship, looking impeccably poised. The queen intimidated him with just her beauty. They were both strikingly gorgeous, but Kai knew none of it was real. His nails dug into the skin on his hand.

Princess Selene was in front of him in no time. He could feel her scrutiny as he bowed. For a moment he was shocked by the potency of the brown eyes she had, staring hard at him. It was a mesmerizing color. Their gazes were locked for a long while.

* * *

The prince was much more handsome in person, she decided. Pictures just didn't do justice to the way his copper colored eyes felt. At the moment, they were at dinner; the queen and the emperor were speaking about something. Selene wasn't paying much attention to it. Her focus was trained on the plate of food in front of her, to avoid looking at Prince Kai.

"You know, Princess," he began to say, causing Selene to flinch (which she immediately felt embarrassed about). "We _are_ kind of engaged…"

Her eyes widened, of seemingly their own accord. "Where could you possibly be going with this?" she asked, nerves itching at her. Her voice sounded demanding, though she was only vaguely aware of the fact.

"Well – I don't know – don't you think we should at least try to be friends?" he asked. "We'll probably be married for a while, most likely." His lips quirked upwards. This easy smile nearly convinced Selene to do the same. Nearly.

With narrowed eyes, she scrutinized him, resurfacing memories of earlier that day. This only severed to put her more on edge. After a moment, she relented, sighing. "…You're right. I mean, I'd kinda like to get to get to know you better – since we're going to be spending the rest of 'eternity' together and all…" she said, a small burst of laughter erupting from her.

Her vow said nothing against becoming friends with the prince.

* * *

That night she and Prince – Kai, as he told her to call him – took a walk through the gardens, surrounded by peonies and roses and tulips and all the Earthen flowers she could name. And even some she couldn't and had resorted to asking Kai.

"What are these ones? They're so pretty!" she said, sniffing something he would later explain to be called narcissus flowers, with a laugh at her enthusiasm. "Everything here is so beautiful." Selene found herself unable to help the grin that spread across her face as she turned to look back at Kai, who was watching her amusedly.

"Yes, I agree," he said absently, lips twitching. Their conversation bloomed from there, going from their childhoods, to their friends, to just simply funny stories. Selene couldn't stop laughing at a tale Kai was telling her about a time he went on a date with a fangirl. Then, though she dreaded it, they moved on to talking about their upcoming nuptials.

"How do you feel about it, Selene?" Kai asked curiously. Night had sprung upon the Commonwealth, and the sun was setting in an orange sky – making the gardens look even more beautiful then they already were.

Though she was distracted with the perfection of Earth, she manage to stutter out a reply, "O-of course, I don't want to get married – stars, I'm only sixteen! Surely we're too young to be engaged. You'd think our parents would understand that…"

Kai was quiet for a moment. "I…completely agree with you. I don't want to get married at all. There's still so much I'd like to do, you know – no offense, obviously." He smiled a bit, but it was forced.

She was really glad he understood. They sat in silence for a few minutes as the sun fell gradually from the sky, leaving a silver Luna in its place on a dark blue backdrop. It was marvelous. Selene let a sigh escape her.

"Earth is exceptional," she said, unable to keep her stare off the planet before her. "And I thought it looked nice from Luna…it's nothing compared to this."

Kai grinned. "How would you like for me to show you more of New Beijing tomorrow? We could go to the market or something." Looking at him and his charming smile, which made something inside of her shiver in anticipation, she couldn't help but return the grin.

"I'd like that, Kai."

* * *

Their day in the city did, in fact, start with the market. Luckily, Kai had prepared for the inevitable stares that would come their way, so they both dressed inconspicuously (despite being trailed by one of Selene's guards). She borrowed one of his hoodies – her slight form was nearly drowned in it – and bypassed her glamour that day. Without it she was pretty, but not stunning and eye-catching like she had been with her glamour on. This in no way hindered his view of her.

He was wearing his baggy gray sweater, the one he always wore in that kind of situation. As long as they kept their heads down, no one really noticed them. Selene offered to manipulate the people to look away, but he was against it. He didn't like the idea of the Lunar gift in general.

Their first stop in the market was the bakery run by Chang Sacha. The woman didn't notice them for who they really were, either. Her cinnamon buns were amazing, which Kai had boasted about during the hover ride. He was happy to see that he'd been right that she'd like it.

The next booth they stopped at it was across the square. Here there was a girl, surrounded by huge bunches of flowers. It was, in fact, a florist shop. Selene expressed her concern that a teenager was running it, so they had been tempted to go over.

"Hello!" said the small girl enthusiastically. "Welcome to our –" She stopped speaking abruptly. "Stars! Your Highness!" she squealed with excitement, quickly falling into a curtsy.

A snort came from beside him. Selene was smirking. Heat climbed up his body – his ears became unbearably warm.

"Could we, possibly, keep the 'your highness' stuff down?" he said as politely as he could, wincing. The girl nodded, jumping up and down, her broad grin not lessening in the slightest. That is, until her gaze shifted over to Selene standing next to him. Her hopping ceased.

Kai winced again. "Yes, yes, it's the princess," he relented, barely resisting the urge to roll his eyes a bit. The girl gasped, before averting her eyes to the booth around her. It seemed she remembered herself. She straightened her back.

"What would you two like to buy today?" she asked, stare only then lifting from the ground. "We just received a new shipment of poppies! They are rather pretty." The girl smiled.

He looked through the shop. It had been Selene's idea to come to the florist. "Selene?" A hum, in response. "What would you like?" This time, she turned a wide-eyed look upon him, a frown creasing her brow.

There were a couple moments before she ceased her scrutiny him and returned her gaze back onto the girl in front of them. "Do you have any narcissus flowers, miss? Or maybe…those peonies look very nice. How much are they?" The girl listed the price. It wasn't much for a bouquet of the white and fully blossomed flowers. Kai bought them without question – the resulting smile on Selene's face brought up a squirming feeling in the pit of his abdomen.

* * *

The first time they kissed was two days later, stolen in the middle of an elevator. His lips melded against hers, soft and just right. Warmth flooded through her, as well as the pumping sound of her heart resounding in her ears. Selene couldn't place the feeling of him against her, in the middle of a conversation she couldn't even remember. Kisses of the past were nothing to him. It felt abnormally right, abnormally perfect.

His hands hugged her waist, as her own crept up his chest and onto his shoulders. It was a desperate, random kiss, sprung up in haste. Sprung up in the sudden realization that she needed him against her (or maybe it was the other way around) for one reason or another. They had just been laughing about something, before their eyes locked. A rush passed through her, and their lips were meeting and there was no time to process the information.

A ding sounded around them, drawing reality back into the situation. She tried her hardest to hold on, but the ding meant the elevators would open, and she knew it would be rather undiplomatic to be seen kissing the prince. Allowing one more second of their desperate, stolen, bliss, she ripped herself away, her own vow resonating in her ears. Why she still listened to it was a mystery, to even her.

He was red. Like blindingly, achingly, red. With the way her face burned, she knew she was in a similar state. The elevator doors opened. The people milling about did not heed them much attention.

"Uh," she hesitated, scratching at the back of her head. "I-I'm gonna go," she found herself saying, before she dashed out of the elevator, not daring to spare the prince a glance. She didn't even look behind her until she was out of the corridor.

Their second kiss occurred an hour later. It was nearly as desperate as the first. He'd just knocked on her door, somehow knowing Selene would be in there. A moment passed of the two of them staring into the other's eyes, entranced. Every single feeling Kai had was poured into the one look. He dared to throw her a grin. This must have set her off – her hand clutched at his shirt as she pulled him into her room and down to her mouth. An instinct prompted him to shut the door behind him.

She pushed him forcefully onto it, never once detaching herself from him. They were pressed up like this for a while before she relented a bit, weakening her grip on his shirt and pulling back. His hand searched for her side to keep her in place. The kiss broke. Their smirks were simultaneous, each flirtatious and begging for more.

"Princess." Selene rolled her eyes. "Why'd you stop?"

* * *

There were many more kisses to come. Each one was taken in absolute privacy for the sake of professionalism. From the desperate start, they eased into sweetness. It became harder and harder not to pretend they weren't so intimately familiar with each other in front of others. Dinner with their parents became a chore, as well as meetings about future relations between Luna and the Commonwealth.

Though they weren't openly affiliated with each other, they suspected their parents had suspicions. After all, they couldn't hide their lingering gazes or any other telltale signs of a crush. These suspicions must have been why, Selene guessed, the queen decided to pay her a visit one morning, two weeks into her stay (an infinite amount of kisses).

"My dear Selene," the familiar voice said the familiar saying. Queen Channary gave her special smile, reserved for her daughter only. It was different then the cat-like grin she usually wore, which bordered on unnerving. Her special smile was more authentic – lovelier.

"Mother. Good morning," Selene said happily, pleased that her mother had come to see her. They hadn't spoken in private in three nights, though on Luna they sat together in the queen's bedroom everyday, relaying events to each other, a picture perfect mother and daughter relationship.

(This, no doubt, meant she forgave her mother.)

"I've noticed something," started the queen, her tone curious. "You and the prince have certainly gotten quite well aquatinted…" Channary's eyes widened pointedly, but Selene was extra careful not to falter. "Is it too forward of me to assume there is something…more _private_ …going on between you two?" she asked, her Selene-smile morphing into a playful smirk.

Heat floated across Selene's face. Inwardly, she cursed her ability to blush so easily. Channary's smirk broadened. "Mother." She knew she sounded scolding, despite who she was speaking to – her mother as well as the queen. "I'd very much prefer those things to _stay_ private, if you'd please."

Channary laughed. "Of course, my dear. I take this to mean you are not so adverse to the idea of the marriage alliance anymore?"

Heart sinking, Selene's smile faltered, but she caught it before it could fall entirely. She had not been thinking about the wedding in a very long time. How could _whatever_ she and Kai were work? They were going to be married in a few months. What if this _thing_ didn't work? Then she would be stuck in a loveless marriage by 20, but on top of that, they'd hate each other. If only they'd just stayed friends – but no, then the unresolved tension would drive her mad.

Stars.

The next time Kai and Selene were together was that night, which was more than enough time for Selene's worries to be come unbearable. She had snuck away to his room once most of the palace servants had left and she knew her mother was in her room. It occurred to her that if she brought up her qualms, it would be even more likely for them to decide to stop their _thing_. This was a turn of events she refused to accept.

The moment he'd opened the door, she had jumped on him, nerves frayed. She'd just wanted to forget everything, forget the worry she felt, forget the inevitable down spiral of their relationship.

 _No matter how handsome._

She pressed herself harder against him. Somehow it made sense to her that the closer he was, the less the words would resonate in her ears. Impossibly closer, the space got impossibly tighter, impossibly more tension filled. His arms tightened around her waste. Their kisses hadn't been this desperate since the very beginning. It was obvious something was terribly wrong.

 _No matter how kind._

In spite of the closeness, Selene could not block this out. He pulled his mouth from hers, depriving her. Their breaths mingled as her gift picked up on his confused emotions. More words played in her head, and she pressed her lips to his, trying but failing to stop them.

 _She would never love the prince._

* * *

The morning of the festival was spent at an excited breakfast table. Even Selene herself was anticipating a great night with Kai, before she would leave in two days. She was not looking forward to their departure, but she thought that maybe it would be enough time to quell her feelings for him before she returned to Earth to begin planning the wedding – and then to actually have it.

She had mostly forgotten her worries by that time, but every time they touched a part of her whispered, "This will not last," and it really did the job. Nonetheless, her resolve broke with each kiss. Their relationship would only bring her pain, she knew.

However, she would be spending the whole day with her mother making sure she looked absolutely perfect for the ball. Making sure she looked absolutely perfect for Kai. Of course, she could just glamour herself into looking presentable, but she would feel as if she cheated, and she knew it wouldn't impress him.

They would be locked away in her chambers right up until the peace festival began, which meant there would be no seeing the prince during that time. Breakfast would be their only time before. They still sat right next to each other, as they had since the first day. As Queen Channary loudly spoke about her excitement for the ball that night and Emperor Rikan humored her, Kai had leaned over and said in a soft, quiet voice, "Do try to save me a dance, Princess." He winked as a grin spread across his face.

She couldn't help but roll her eyes at the formality. "Of course – there's no one I'd rather dance with," she whispered back.

* * *

Kai and his father waited above the stairs to be announced. Usually this happened once most of the people on the guest list were there already, so no one would miss the emperor and the prince. After them, he knew, would be the Lunar royal family. He hadn't seen them – Selene – since breakfast, and would only see them once he was already on the floor, since they were personal guests of the Commonwealth.

He always dreaded the ball, though it was supposed to symbolize another year of happiness and peace after World War IV. In the years previous, he had been incessantly annoyed by fangirls, who had every year assumed he was looking for a wife – which he hadn't. He'd be left exhausted from all the socializing and dancing and politeness. It was hard to keep a fake smile the whole night when he was not having any fun in the least. He missed the days before his thirteenth birthday. Back then he had just been sent to his room the whole night, allowed to do whatever he pleased.

This year, however, was much different. He actually had someone he wanted to dance with. Selene. Not only were they really great friends, but somewhat romantically involved (though they had never specified on the nature of their affair). She would make the night that much better.

"Now, announcing His Imperial Majesty Crown Prince Kaito of the Eastern Commonwealth!" said the omnipresent voice of a man, his boasting sound projected into the hall. Kai was careful to smile and to keep his back straight as he walked. Every stare in the room was focused on him. It was not long before he was standing among them, watching as his father was announced after him. Then, Queen Channary, wicked grin spread on her face, looking gorgeous in her skin-tight, see-through black dress. To others, he was sure she looked irresistible, but he was not focused on her so much.

There was one announcement left. "Now, announcing Her Imperial Majesty Crown Princess Selene of Luna!" said the voice, in the exact same, falsely enthusiastic tone he had used the three other times.

Selene looked more amazing than any other time he'd seen her. The gown she was wearing fell to the floor around her, white and lacey. Pure silk gloves reached her elbows. An elegantly twisted bun rested on her head, not one brown hair out of place. Her lips were painted ruby red and she walked with a confident step, shoulders drawn back.

Their eyes met. He grinned at her, and was surprised she didn't become flustered, as she usually would have.

As soon as she'd reached the area where the rest of the royalty was standing, classical music began, and guests gingerly started to waltz. Kai reached out a hand to Selene. "I'd like to have that dance you saved me," he said, smirking.

This time, he was proud to see her blush. "Certainly, Prince Kai," she said, taking his hand. He led them in their dance. It felt nice to be able to hold her in front of other people, to prove to them that for once he was already tied down. The urge to kiss her became impossible to repress.

Trying to remain diplomatic and tactful, he led her off the floor. "Perhaps you would like to accompany me to the gardens, Your Highness?" he asked, knowing someone would most likely overhear them. She swallowed and nodded, as a look of conspiracy flitted through her gaze.

Unconsciously, he held onto her hand and led her outside. As soon as he was sure they'd be out of sight, he captured her lips, unable to wait any longer. She returned the kiss, wrapping her arms behind his neck. This continued for a minute or two, though it could have been hours and Kai still wouldn't have felt satisfied, before she pulled away from him. She didn't break their embrace, however, and they just looked at each other for a few moments.

"Kai."

"Selene." He waited for her to speak, but she didn't, so he continued. "I don't want you to leave."

Her face contorted in apparent pain. He traced circles in the small of her back, waiting, as she seemed to fight with herself over something. "Kai," she said finally. "What – what is this?" And there it was – the question they had been avoiding for the most part of the month she had stayed at the palace. The question that was bound to bring up every single problem with their precarious little arrangement.

"I don't know." Kai shook his head as she removed her arms from around his neck and rested them on his shoulders. He could feel her slipping away, but he wanted to tell her she was a few days early.

"I hardly think this is the kind of relationship two people who are _engaged_ should have."

"In that case, shouldn't we be – you know – dating? Openly?"

"But what if it doesn't work, Kai?" She sounded frantic now, and she used her grip on his chest to push him away from her. When she took a few steps back and turned away, Kai couldn't quite quell the feeling of hurt hopelessness he began to feel. "We'd be stuck in this _marriage_ , hating each other!"

"No, you're wrong. That's just why we have to try our hardest to make this work, Selene, don't you see?" No. She didn't see. Selene felt like she wanted to run away, run far away from Kai and never see him again.

"We are stuck together, whether we like it or not, yes. We can't just let his die now. I'm not going to resign to being tied to one person who I hate for the rest of my life. I won't let it happen. We _have_ to make it work."

"But how?" she couldn't help but shout at him. "How do we make a marriage neither of us want work?"

"We can start by actually being together. And not being afraid to admit that fact."

"And what if we no longer want to be with each other?"

"We have to be. So we make it work. We be friends."

He made it sound so simple. She almost wanted to believe him. Almost wanted to hug him and pretend their lives were perfect and they would always be perfect. He made it sound as if it would be happily ever after, like there wouldn't be heartbreak. For a long moment, she did not reply, an internal battle waging in her head.

Okay. If she was being honest, she was scared. The idea of being married itself terrified her, not the idea of being married to him specifically. The idea of her entire future being tied down terrified her. It was not him she was scared of.

But then again – it was. Something else horrified her much more then being married – being in love. But maybe it was not a fear of being in love, but instead a fear of heartbreak. She was afraid of falling for Kai, and then having her heart shattered every day afterwards, for the rest of her life.

What if Kai was right? Maybe it really was simple. It was possible she would never face heartbreak at his hands if they worked at their relationship hard enough. If next time they decided to talk about it, rather than letting their insecurities fester inside of them, burning on to the next day. No one ever said love was easy. Her mother always said love was a conquest.

Love was a war.

Perhaps it was. Perhaps that's why it was so beautiful. Because you had to work for it. Because it _was_ hard. Because it _was_ painful. If love weren't a war, then what would be the point? Wars are fought because each side has something worth fighting for.

Was she ready to fight this war?

"Selene?" he asked. He was right behind her now, and they were both looking up at silver Luna as it gently illuminated the night.

She knew the answer. That wasn't her choice to make.

Rather than replying to Kai, she reached for him, taking his mouth in a kiss, soft and sweet in the darkness. He relaxed against her, his arms reaching around her and tightening in a warning – _don't leave_. She wouldn't dare. His arms were like safety. They felt like a reassurance. In that kiss, she accepted something she had known for a while, something she had tried to fight.

Her vow had been broken.


End file.
